The search of self

Today I started to realize that I am starting a search of self. I know that I need to fully emabrace my experience here. To be an open vessel of God resting in each moment. This is a once in a life time experience. I am already loving each day as it arise anew. I have to be honest that a part of me is sad in leaving people, places etc behind yet I know I have found a world of new places, and people who will be my teachers. I have had many teachers before...the world is my teacher and everyones face is the embrace of God. The night is quiet as I lie there with myself. Thoughts rush through my head of conversations long gone. The quiet is almost ghostly..this reaching internal is real. I was told before I traveled that a missionaries best friend is prayer...prayer continues to connect you to why you are there..whever there may be..Prayer awakes the deeper issues within that make you human to begain. Prayer helps you let go of unrealist expectations..prayer lets you see the broken human in us all. Prayer for me is being blunt with God no holding back with angelic tongues yet being real in the search for self...EVOLVING ....